Sex is good. Emotionally it is very good and I’ve read in a lot of places that it is physically good too. That is, good for the health and mind.
What most people do not know however is that, just as we have unhealthy food that can cause our bodies harm, we have unhealthy sex that can cause our minds harm.
Follow me as I list the types of sex that might do more damage to your mind than good.
1. Break up sex- after break up, a lot of emotions are involved. Whether or not you were the dumper or the dumpee, there are a lot of things happening at that point. It is usually not the period to make hasty emotional or sexual decisions. Yet, a lot of people can’t help but find themselves in that situation.
What usually happens during this, is that one of the parties always hopes to bring the other party back with the sex which never happens. If the love you used to share didn’t make him/her stay, showing him/her how fantastic and great you were in bed wouldn’t.
The result of this act is usually a party feeling bad and worse than he/she felt before the act.
2. Sex on first date- there is no laid down rule on the number of weeks or months to wait before deciding to get under the sheets with the new guy. But as a woman, if you have sex on the first date simply because you want him to come back or for some ridiculous reason, then you sure are doing something unhealthy for yourself, putting yourself in a bad place.
3. Sex when drunk- Yes it might be so much fun and crazy and exhilarating but it is also silly, dangerous and extremely stupid especially if it is someone you just met or someone you haven’t known enough. Anything can go wrong while having sex when drunk (I mean not wearing protection, not making use of your head like you should and so on) and these things you might have to pay for seriously.
So maybe when next you’re drunk, you can grab your car keys and head home to end the night.
4. Make up sex- sex after a huge fight/disagreement has been resolved can be so great, so amazing. But sex every time you disagree or argue might just be unhealthier than you think. Whenever you both rely on makeup sex to fix your relationship issues, great as it may be at the beginning, one of you would soon begin to feel used and neglected and with time there’ll be cracks in the relationship
Sex can’t fix everything. You will need to realise that and fix your issues yourself.
5. Pity sex- this is the lamest reason to get down with anybody. Sleeping with them because you pity them. This happens more to women and they do it because they want the guy to get off their backs and they give him what he wants to make him feel better. What about what you feel? Does that matter at all?
Some women also give out their bodies because the men they are with has started pressuring them and is threatening to get it somewhere else if they don’t give in. Another lame reason to have sex. If all he is about is sex then maybe you shouldn’t be in that relationship.
6. Sex out of duty- this type of sex refers to sleeping with your partner when you would rather not simply because it is your duty to do it.
It is very unhealthy. This is because you are doing it as a chore and not enjoying it as you should. When sex becomes a chore, it only means one thing, that you aren’t so excited to be with your partner anymore. Now this can stem out from a whole lot of things but what can be worse than the situation is when you constantly do it just because it is what is required of you.
Talk about it with your partner. Get therapy or counselling if you have to.
But don’t continue sex with the person until you are sure you really want to do it. It’ll only make you feel worse, resent the person more and make the sex more unappealing.
posted by Daniel chinex